"Client 9" was a stinker in bedA guest column by Kristen

(Another fine mediocre pretty damn lame JRT parody)

Hi, I'm Kristen, and I serviced the now famous "client 9."

"	The true crime here is not that he hired me, but that the experience was so horrendous!	"

Yes, that's right. I'm a call girl. And I'm not ashamed. Why should I be? The money's great and I enjoy the sex and the traveling.

Well, I usually enjoy the sex.

Just not with him.

The media reports say that the encounter lasted a few hours, but it was truthfully only about a minute.

It was TERRIBLE!

Worst client I've ever had.

The true crime here is not that he hired me, but that the experience was so horrendous!

I mean, I've serviced a lot of famous and/or powerful people in the past with my job and it hasn't bothered me a bit. If a list of the people I've serviced in the past were to ever come out then you'd probably see a fourth of our government resign in disgrace.

You know, all the guys up in DC here, away from their families and wives, they get lonely and/or horny.

I don't see anything wrong with it. After all, it's my body and I should be able to do what I want with it!

Kristen, a former employee of the Emperors Club VIP call-girl service, is currently seeking employment with another service. Don't bother trying to contact her, she'll contact you.