Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Something that just boggles my mind

Safe sex is a good thing. I think we'd all agree on that, right?

I think we'd also agree that we should do things to encourage people to have safe sex if they're going to have it, right?

With that being said, why do places like Walgreens keep the condoms in a locked glass case? Seriously, you really think people want to go find someone to unlock the case so they can get their freak on?

I know I don't, I'm too shy. I'd be red as a tomato the whole time.

Maybe it's an extension of Bush's abstinence-only sex ed program, discouraging sex through embarrassment.

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Monday, April 28, 2008

Dear Pinnacle Systems,


I've been using one of your TV tuners for well over a year and a half. I've tolerated your crappy hardware and buggy software because it got the job done.

Well, tonight it didn't.

Ya see, I set it up to record House for me tonight while I was out playing softball.

When I got home, I hopped onto my computer to check it and I see an error message that PMCloader.exe encountered a problem and needs to close.

I checked my videos folder, nothing there.


Because of some "problem" with your crappy software I missed the first episode of House since the strike!


Your tuner will be replaced ASAP.

Thanks for nothing,


Florida wants to castrate your truck

The Florida legislature wants to get their hands on your junk:

They're proudly displayed by any self-respecting bull, but dangling big metal ones on the back end of a truck could be banned in Florida.

Metal replicas of bull testicles have become trendy bumper ornaments in some parts of the Sunshine State, but state Sen. Carey Baker is campaigning to ban the orbs.

If they're tackling truck testes then they must have everything else taken care of, right?

Baker acknowledged that Florida lawmakers have more pressing issues, including huge revenue shortfalls, but said the state needs to draw a line on what's obscene before more objectionable adornments appear.

I guess not...

In all honesty, I've got no problem with these. Sure it's stupid, but a lot of people put a lot of stupid stuff on their cars. You know, all those people with spinners and lights under their car and all that other stupid stuff.

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Sunday, April 27, 2008

How much of a maniac am I behind the wheel?

Welcome to Stupid Quiz Sunday, in which I'll take an online quiz that may or may not be stupid and post the results.

Your Driving Is is: 47% Male, 53% Female
According to studies, you drive both like a guy and a girl.
This means you're a pretty average driver, with typical quirks.
Occasionally you're frustrated and or a little reckless, but that's the exception - not the norm.

Have you taken this quiz? Have a quiz you want me to take? Leave a link in the comments.

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Saturday, April 26, 2008

I got ya!

Welcome to Friday Saturday Photo, a new feature where I share photos that I've taken with the world.

This week I've got my first photo from a Drillers game. This one was shot last Saturday night as they beat Conroe 56-30.

08-04-26 drillers

I don't have any rosters so I don't know who's who or anything, but I can tell you that the Drillers are wearing black and I think that's from a sack.

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Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Tuesday, April 22, 2008


After repeated delays, we finally got to kick off the softball season yesterday evening.

They stuck me in right field, which I wasn't upset about since nothing got hit towards me all game. The way the sun was right in my eyes it's not like I would have seen it coming anyway.

I got two plate appearances. I could see while I was on deck that the pitcher for the other team was shaking off some rust so I was patient at the plate. I watched strike one go by and then managed to resist as the next four all either hit the plate or fell short, sending me to second (in co-ed, men get to go to second on a walk to discourage walking them to get to women, as the lineups alternate between the sexes) and bringing in a run.

The second appearance I worked the count full and hit a hard grounder to the first basemen, who flipped the ball to the pitcher and got me by a step.

So I went 0-1 with a BB and an RBI. I'm not upset.

Next week we've got a doubleheader, which'll be nice.

Now if I can just remember to look up what the ASA strike zone is.

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Sunday, April 20, 2008

Trapped in a vacuum

(NOTE: This is the first post of a new weekly feature I'm calling "Stupid Quiz Sunday," in which I'll take an internet quiz and post the results here for everybody to see)

How long could you survive in the vacuum of space?
Created by OnePlusYou

Have you taken this quiz? Have a quiz you want me to take? Leave a link in the comments.

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Friday, April 18, 2008

Seeing the one that got away

Welcome to Friday Photo, a new feature where I share photos that I've taken with the world.

I know I missed last week. Hopefully this'll make up for it.

looking back

Charlotte Checkers' goalie Mike Ayers looks back at a puck that got past him and into the net during a game against the Texas Wildcatters on January 5, 2008. The Wildcatters went on to win the game 4-1.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

This blog NOT recommended for kids

(Spotted on JimThompson.org)

I ran the blog through the Cuss-O-Meter:

The Blog-O-Cuss Meter - Do you cuss a lot in your blog or website?
Created by OnePlusYou

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Fun Trivia

Q: How do you become two years older than everybody thought you were?

A: Admit you lied about it:

Saying he wanted to unburden himself, Miguel Tejada approached general manager Ed Wade and asked to correct misinformation he gave the Oakland A’s when he signed in 1993. The Astros’ new shortstop is actually 33, two years older than he’s listed in the club’s media guide and other baseball records.

Tejada was actually 19 when he signed as a kid out of poverty-stricken Bani, Dominican Republic. At the time, he says, a local coach encouraged him to say he was 17.

"I'm a poor kid that wanted to sign," he said. "I’m feeling free now,” he said. “It’s something that I had in my mind.”

Someone's bound to make a big stink out of this, but I don't really see it as a huge thing. I mean, how many times in the history of the game has stuff like this happened?

After all, the Astros don't see it as a big deal.

“Fact of the matter is that he plays like he's 25, so I don't think it really matters a whole lot,” said [Astros GM Ed] Wade, who indicated the age discrepancy first came out during the course of a media interview. “We're still trying to figure out Jose Cruz Sr's age.”

If they're not upset then i see no reason to be.

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Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Supreme Court: the needle ride to hell is not cruel and unusual punishment

Go to hell, go directly to hell, do not pass go, do not collect $200:

In a case closely watched in Texas, the U.S. Supreme Court today upheld the use of lethal injection for executing convicted killers in Kentucky.

The 7-2 decision clears the way for 36 states, including Texas, to resume lethal injections. Those executions had been delayed for more than six months since the high court first agreed to hear the case. The case splintered the Supreme Court into five factions and no single opinion garnered a majority.

As y'all might remember, I have zero sympathy for people on death row suffering while poison is pumping through their veins.

So, when's Huntsville going to start catching up?

Idaho Dems have an alternative to Clinton and Obama in their upcoming primary

If you're an Idaho Democrat and you don't feel like being conned by Clinton or Obama in November, you can vote for a con:

A federal prison inmate got himself listed on the ballot for Idaho's May 27 primary as a Democratic presidential candidate, the state's top election official said.

Keith Russell Judd is serving time at the Beaumont Federal Correctional Institution in Texas for making threats at the University of New Mexico in 1999. He's scheduled for release in 2013.

Judd, 49, qualified for the ballot by submitting a notarized form and paying the required $1,000 fee, state Secretary of State Ben Ysursa said. As a result, Democratic voters will be able to choose between Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton and Judd.

Sounds to me like Ohio needs to tighten up their standards a little.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Local high school's targeted mentoring a prime example of the hypocrisy of race relations today

The ACLU is making an inquiry over an assembly at a local high school:

West Brook High School administrators on Wednesday defended a black-male-only mentoring session that has prompted a recent inquiry by the American Civil Liberties Union.

The March 29 program, dubbed the "Big 3 Conference," was an invitation-only event for the school's more than 800 African-American males in the ninth, 10th and 11th grades.

The sessions were divided by grade-level and addressed issues such as education, test scores, crime, family and gangs.


"I think it's really problematic on its face," [ACLU Foundation of Texas legal director Lisa Graybill] said by phone Wednesday. "Targeting a specific ethnicity for a program I find extremely worrisome."


"On what basis is the conclusion being drawn that black people need some kind of special intervention and to what end is that intervention tailored?" Graybill said.

I'm a West Brook alum (Class of 2003) and I can recall a couple of instances where students were pulled for targeted assemblies, which are listed after the jump:

  • My freshman year there was one where all the girls in the entire school were pulled for some sort of women's health awareness thing, something I'm glad I wasn't forced to attend.
  • There was one where all the Asian students were pulled out of class for some sort of assembly. I don't remember any details on that one.

Dividing people up by color, creed, or whatever else is wrong, no matter the reason. Martin Luther King preached it and I believe it.

That belief is the reason I have such a problem with this. It's similar to how people like Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson claim to preach equality whilst trying to differentiate themselves, to make themselves special in one way or another. That's not equality, it's hypocrisy. I sincerely believe that people like that do more to damage race relations in this country than they do to improve them.

What they did is wrong, it's that simple. There's no excuse for it.

Now I'm not going to go screaming for people to be fired or anything but I do believe that the people involved come out and man up to their mistake. Just come out and apologize so we can all get on with our lives.

But what do you do about the issue of hypocrisy in race relations? I believe that if people would just look back at the message that MLK left us and stick to those principles then the hypocrisy would go away.

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

The straw that broke the camel's back

I finally had it with the hockey team.

A couple weeks back I bought a playoff ticket package.

On Monday I went to the office to pick them up and was told that parking wasn't included with the packages this year.

I was like "WHAT?"

Ya see, the free parking with the packages is what makes the packages such a bargain to me. That's $5 a game I'm saving. $85 if all the potential games were played

So I left, muttering to myself and extremely pissed.

On the way home it hit me that this was definitely the straw that broke the camels back, so I decided to turn around and drove back up there and demanded my money back.

I had a talk with Quincy (one of the guys working in the office) where he kept trying to change my mind, telling me that "but this year we have kids prices." I responded "So? Do I look like I have kids?"

Needless to say, they didn't change my mind.

So they tell me that since they'd already deposited my check they'd have to cut me one, but the person who could do that wasn't in and wouldn't be for the rest of the day.

So I called Quincy this morning to see about what time he's supposed to be in and get told "about 10" and that they'd call me back when he got in. I gave them my cell number to get me that way.

About 11:30, still without a phone call, I decided to go treat myself to a birthday lunch at Frankie's, a locally-owned Italian place. Had lasagna, it was great. Then again, I don't think I've ever eaten anything there that I didn't like.

Now let's get back on topic...

While I was in the restaurant I called Quincy I'd been talking to about this and got his voicemail. I asked for an estimate of when he'd be in because "I've got things to do this afternoon." I didn't, but he didn't need to know that.

About 1:30 I called again and talked to him. He said something to the tune of "Oh, he's been in for half an hour, let me go talk to him about it."


Then there's the whole matter of how you manage to keep a job if you're supposed to be in at 10 and don't get in until about 1? Guess it doesn't really matter if you won't be there much longer anyway...

Anyways, he told me that I could bring in the tickets and they'd mail me a check in about a week.

So I took them in.

Pissed me off that I had to go through all that to get my money back, but who ever really is willing to be more than accommodating when people want money back?

Monday, April 07, 2008

The tie remains

The Pulitzers were announced today.

I still have just as many Pulitzers as the Houston Chronicle.

I'm surprised, I thought I would have gotten one for my gripping piece on topics such as:

How the hell do NONE of those win?

Saturday, April 05, 2008

Updated: What do you call it ...

... when your team wins 95-8?

The Beaumont Drillers, our indoor football team, defeated the Wichita Falls Diablos by that margin tonight.

The way I see it, calling that game an ass-kicking just doesn't do it justice.

So what do you call it?

Leave your suggestions in the comments.

UPDATE: Here are some highlights from one of the local TV stations.

Friday, April 04, 2008

Digging out more dog pictures from the archives

Welcome to Friday Photo, a new feature where I share photos that I've taken with the world.

This week we've got an old one of Petey and Bruiser out in the backyard:

080404 Petey and Bruiser lookingWhat the hell is Bear doing?

Beats me, boys!

It took me a long time to get to the point where I could think about Bear and have a smile on my face again. Taffy's helped with that a lot as she took over a lot of the same roles in the pack that Bear had.

Hulu is a great time-waster

This is *NOT* a Pay Per Post or ReviewMe.com ad. I'm doing it of my own free will in part because I don't believe in blogging about something when wads of cold, hard cash are involved.

I've been messing around with Hulu for a while, watching a couple things here and there.

For those that don't know, Hulu is a service that provides ad-supported, on-demand video of movies and TV shows.

Last night I got looking at the movies section and saw Red Dragon on the list. I've been wanting to see that, so I decided to watch it.

Since it's an R-rated movie, I had to register first. Registration was painless, a one page form asking pretty standard questions. It's a kinda stupid hoop to have to jump through considering they don't verify your age, but I didn't mind. The only question I didn't care for was the household income question, but you have the option to not say.

Once I hit submit I went and started up the movie. It launches in a very nice-looking flash player similar to how YouTube works, but with MUCH better quality video. Not TV quality, but still quite good for an internet stream. The site offers the ability to view any of their videos in a resizable pop-up window, which is quite handy for watching and getting other things done at the same time.

Of course, with the free movie you have to endure something. What you endure is an occasional commercial. You only get one ad per break, and the ad is never for longer than thirty seconds. The ads are spaced out about the same way as if you were watching the movie on basic cable.

All in all, I'm quite happy with Hulu and I'll be visiting again.

And, oh yes, I enjoyed Red Dragon a lot.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Just so everybody knows ...

... Houston from Tater Tots for the Masses said on Twitter that he feels "moderately retarded" and told me to "feel free to tell the world."

So I am.

You can thank me later, Houston. :)

OK, if you must see it, here's the story:

Tots4Masses @fatelvis04 Thanks. I feel moderately retarded. Feel free to tell the world. :) 43 minutes ago from web in reply to fatelvis04

fatelvis04 @Tots4Masses Click the Utterz link about 1 hour ago from web in reply to Tots4Masses

Tots4Masses @isfullofcrap IM me a link to the snapshot please. about 1 hour ago from web in reply to isfullofcrap

isfullofcrap As you can plainly see from that snapshot, my crash diet has worked. about 1 hour ago from web

isfullofcrap [utterz] http://tinyurl.com/2rpfm4 Snapshot from work.: Instead of having something useful like network alerts or new prod about 1 hour ago from web

That clear it up for ya?

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Random thoughts about the NCAA South Regional experience

Thought I'd do a post to sum up my experience:

  • Firstly, a humongous FUCK YOU to METRO for jacking up the price of parking at the Fannin Park and Ride unannounced on Sunday. I pull up expecting to pay the normal $2.50 and this dude comes up to me and wants $10 to park. If I was a Houston taxpayer I'd want Frank Wilson's head on a stick for that.
  • Granted the $10 from METRO was a hell of a lot better than the $20 that Reliant wanted.
  • As far as the train itself, I actually liked it. I'll do it again, just steer clear of parking there when there are major events going on.
  • I thought that this would be the best of all the regionals with a lot of close games and I end up with three double-digit wins. That was a little disappointing.
  • Concessions at Reliant are too fucking expensive. $5.50 for a Dr. Pepper is outrageous.
  • I loved the seats. Only real gripe was that there was only about four inches between rows on the risers they set up down low, so you were fighting the heads of tall dudes to see the action. The elevated court did help a lot.
  • The environment was really something, especially for the Sunday game. Friday the crowd was kind of trickling in during the early game (Texas and Stanford) and about half the building left at the half of the Michigan St.-Memphis game (as Memphis was leading 50-20), but they were all there and LOUD for the Sunday game between Memphis and Texas. Shame the outcome wasn't better.
  • My cell phone sucks for texting. Next one's got to have a full keyboard.
  • Memphis is a hell of a lot better of a team than I'd expected them to be. I'd discounted them because they were in Conference USA, but seeing them in person gave me a whole hell of a lot of respect for them. They were just dominating.
  • Wearing a Longhorns hat in public wasn't nearly as bad as I expected it to be but I still won't root for them when they're playing the Aggies.
  • The Memphis and Michigan State fans that I met were all really nice. I'd say the same about Stanford fans, but I don't recall talking to any of them.
  • I should have gone back to Beaumont the back way. Traffic on I-10 was pretty thick since the Memphis fans that drove were going back the same way. I ended up getting off of I-10 at Winnie and taking a two-lane highway that goes about the same route the rest of the way into town.

Well, that's all my tired mind can think of right now.