Sunday, March 26, 2006

A public service announcement from JRT

(A Precision Guided Humor Assignment)

Michelle Malkin recently blogged about going to an anti-war protest with a less-than-stellar turnout.

Since Justin's Random Thoughts is a totally non-partisan (just like the MSM), I thought I'd share my ideas on how to get more people at the protests.

  • Make sure that there's plenty of free green available. You know, mary jane, mauie wowie, wacky tobaccy, reefer, the 11th special herb in KFC's recipe. That'll help get out the hippie crowd. And Willie Nelson, although I hear that his stuff is quite potent.
  • Lots of food, and a very large variety. That way the hippies don't leave after they light up and get the munchies. It should also help attract Michael Moore.
  • Provide deodorant and portable showers and encourage their use because nobody likes smelly protesters.
  • Plenty of private security to keep away the counter-protesters and cops.
  • Petition your state's D.O.T. to put up signs on local freeways to direct folks to the sites. The signs could look a little something like this:
    Click for full size
    (Made using's SignMaker with a few tweaks by me)
  • Promise an appearance by this year's ultimate cinderella, George Mason. That'll get a lot of basketball fans out, and maybe even the guy who played George Mason on 24, since he's apparently a really big fan.

I hope this helps y'all get better attendance.

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